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Archive for February, 2014

 

Until I opened the news paper on the morning of the 15th of February I was not aware that another of those ‘DAYS” had come and gone the day before , smacking me right on the occiput…
The so-called Valentine’s Day!
There was a time when this event was not well-known around these parts where I live. During those times I even used to think that ‘Valentine’ was some sort of fearsome animal like ‘Wolverine” or a blood-sucking vampire!

However today’s ‘youth’ , straining at their leash to get themselves into a bind , have started “celebrating” the event in such a way that my grand mother , had she been alive today, would have fainted , watching it! And recently the “celebrations” have reached such a pass that my grand mother ( the same one as before, mind you! ), had she been alive today, would have sat up from her faint and committed suicide!

In the early days,  love was considered to be a very private affair . If ‘A’ loved ‘B’ , or for that matter vice versa, it was their own private business not to be ‘tom-tomed’ about from the roof top! No one poked his nose into it unless he/she was a parent of the ‘erring couple’ . Also such love was conveyed by them through coy glances and through rolled-up pieces of paper . These were exchanged by the duo when they met in lonely places clandestinely , when no one was looking!
Now, even if one doesn’t want to poke his nose into these affairs , he gets drawn in willy-nilly and it is thrust up his nose by the hype-mongering marketing guys and entertainment establishments . These folks smell a ready-made means in it to make a fast buck and fill their coffers! And love be damned!

During the last Valentine’s Day, some Malls hereabouts hosted these events with much gusto and noisy celebrations ! So much so,  Mister  Cupid who happened to be strolling past these Malls with hands in the pant pockets , deep in thought and minding his own business ,   got himself sucked into it to join the fun and add to the ‘celebrations’!

Students thronged the Mall Halls where the boisterous merry-making was in full swing , at a time when they should all have been home and poring over their text books under shaded lamps! On the contrary, they danced and hollered as though some banshee’s spirit had got into them ! They milled around like ants on a dead cockroach !

While all these celebrations were going on, another set of “moral policing” enthusiasts who wanted to save the country from untold cultural degradation mounted ‘counter attacks’ using various missiles such as rotten tomatoes etc. on some of the revelers who then paused and started thinking whether after all, was it all worth it?

Celebrating such “Days” at the drop of a hat is now the in-thing. And there are plenty of those ‘Days” to pick from. I made a recent search with the Google and was flabbergasted at what Mr. Google came up with!

For instance, did you know that there is something called the “International Day of Zero Tolerance to Female Genital Mutilation” ? It falls on Feb 6th!
It is reported that more than 125 million girls and women alive today have been at the receiving end of this horrible practice which is observed in some 29 countries spanning Africa and Middle East !
And that “Day” comes just 8 days before the ‘Valentine’s Day’ ! But no “Mall” ever thought of ‘celebrating’ it or even remembering it !
Probably because there is no money in it 🙂

Then there is the ‘Hug Day” on February 13th, though I don’t know what exactly one is supposed to do on that day except perhaps the most obvious thing:) !
Maybe a warm up towards the following ‘Valentine Day’?

Another “Day” that sent me into uncontrollable chuckles is the ‘Thinking Day” , falling on the 22nd of February!
Maybe we are supposed to ‘think’ only on that day and ‘act like mad ’ on all other 364 days!

I also came across a ‘World Sparrow Day” ( March 20th )! The sparrows would have been as perplexed about it as me, I am sure!
The “World Water Day” was another ‘head-knocker’ and it falls on March 22nd !
And wait , there is more…
There is a mind boggling candidate called the “Purple Day” which is scheduled for March 26th! In case you don’t know , if you add a dash of potassium permanganate to water on 22nd, ( the size of the ‘dash’ depending on the quantity of water you start with:-) ), it will turn purple by 26th or for that matter, even earlier! So there may be a ‘sibiling-like ’ connection between these two ‘Days”!

Every one knows the significance of April 1st… but do you know that April 15th is pegged as the “Day of Silence” ?
Wow! Which crank could have conceived this idea? Would he like to sell that to the warring folks in Syria ? You simply can’t walk into the gun fire , raise a hand and shout: ‘Hey, Stop all that noise for the day!” There will be some technical hitches in doing that… such as getting shot and killed 😉
Also our poor women folk would be hard put to observe that day:) It can become a big strain on their vocal chords !

Pregnant ladies please note! May 5th is the “Midwives Day” ( read: midwives’ non-working
day !)
If you happen to choose that day to deliver your load you will have to pull out the junior on your own! And you alone will be responsible for the consequences !
For example, a boy may emerge as a eunuch because you pulled it out by the wrong part of it’s body !
Moving on, 25th of May is set aside as the “Towel Day” ! To celebrate it in my own modest manner I think (not on Think Day ) that I should go out and get me a Turkish towel!

What really takes the cake is the ‘World Mosquitoes Day” which falls on August 20th!
As if bugging us right through most of the days (and nights) is not enough, now they have assigned this special Day to these ‘blood-thirsty terrorists’ to play hell with our sleep!
However there is a silver lining!
If we were to go by the habits of the practitioners the “May Day” who down all their tools on the 1st of May , we can hope that perhaps no mosquito in its right frame of mind will ever pick up its syringe and go to work on that day!

Not to be out done in this business , there are a few other ‘memorable’ days . For example there is the “International Talk Like a Pirate Day” on Sept. 19th ! ( Must have got the idea from Johnny Depp of the movie “Pirates of the Caribbean” )
There is also a “Global Hand washing Day” on Oct.15th! Imagine the gallons of water which will be wasted on that day by some 7.146 billions earthlings with unwashed hands! )

And don’t forget the “World Toilet Day” on November 19th! I think I don’t have to be explicit on what you all should be doing on that day!

world toilet day

All told, we have very few days left out of the 365 days of the year to be by ourselves and live our own “ Personal and Private Days”!

No, folks, I am not “Day” dreaming, !

 

 

 

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