Archive for March, 2012

Inaugurations And Ads Thereof

Today I saw an Ad in the news papers about an ‘impending’ Inauguration of a “Golden Jubilee Celebrations” . It was so intimidating that I all but decided to get into a hole and pull it in after me! Looking closely I found that it was the ‘Golden Jubilee Celebrations’ of a blasted educational institution- blasted because the Ad took up a full page of the news space that I was paying for through my nose to read.
The Ad announced that these usurpers of news paper space had ‘immense pleasure’ – it also added ‘honour’- to invite suckers like me to come and ‘grace the occasion’ at some god-forsaken place …something I had no intention to as it was a good distance away from my place. The full page Ad sported some 6 or 7 pictures of the revered institution, white-washed and looking coy!!

A golden Jubilee tag demands a minimum existence of 50 years. But from the look of these pix , the building didn’t appear to be a day older than some 4-5 years! Apparently 50 years ago the building contractors were quite reliable and honest, unlike those of the present day, and built their buildings to last! Now-a-days, I won’t be surprised if the building collapsed on the contractor himself, as he bowed out with the fat cheque of final payment!

To run a full page Ad in a national news paper it costs a pretty packet these days ! And God knows how many more editions of this and other newspapers had carried this Ad ! All this must have totaled to a tidy sum which must have come from the exorbitant fees these institutions charged their wards for their ‘world class’ 50-year-strong coaching’!

Rubbing shoulders with the institution’s pix were a long line up of photos of dignitaries who are supposed to ‘grace the occasion’ along with you! ( May not be sitting on the same bench as you , though!). The page was a classic line-up of ‘Who Is Who’ in this business of inauguration! Vertically and horizontally positioned, there were some 14 odd faces, some smiling and others grim-looking. They stared at you , sporting the ‘navarasas’ of the ‘inauguration technique’ .

At the top of the line up of photos was that of a well-known and globally respected personality who , I am sure , hates this types of extragavanzas!….Coming up behind him, a strong array of politicians of all types and shades took over , closely followed by officials of all hue! I surreptitiously turned the page over to see if there were more mugs on the next page! Fortunately there were none!

Seating them all on the dais must be a daunting task for the organisers! And I shudder at what would have been the case had it been a platinum jubilee.. A separate stage I suppose! 😦

Why should these people go to such extremes ? Inviting half the world to ‘grace’ such functions? The answer I think , is simple…for favours to be received.

These guys invite as many as can be harnessed so that even if a few don’t turn up or turn out to be bad eggs there will still be enough left for their purpose! . Theirs is the same technique as that of the sea turtle…She – the turtle, not the organisers:)- lays upto 200 eggs or so at one sitting , covers them up and leaves the rest to the Nature. Nature being a clever bitch will see to it that many of the hatchlings are mopped up by predators. But at the end of the day the turtle still wins because of the number game and comes up on top…with enough hatchlings to spread her progeny!

The other risk that the organisers run is the possibility that the invitee speakers don’t turn up on time, throwing the organised programmes into disarray…But then you can’t have the cake and eat it too!

Whichever way you look at it, in the end the Audience is the looser!


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