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Archive for June, 2010

Dear Visitors, There seems to be something amiss with this site. The graphics in my posts all seem to be missing. Also  the feeling I get while trying to upload or embed kar2ns is that there is some problem with the server. I have written to them and till I get their reply and clarification I am holding further posting because my posts without kar2ns are incomplete in themselves. Sorry for the break, as the TV guys say!

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It is quite some years since the first FM radio station, promising ‘24×7,continuous , non-stop  music ’ hit the ether in Kerala… way back  on November 29, 2007 ,to be precise. Close on its heels followed many others , like vultures after a kill…all promising the same kind of fare.

Initially,  it was indeed like a breath of fresh air after the ‘monotonic tonic’ dished out by the the government-owned FM radio stations. As a morning walker with the earphones glued to the … er… ears, I was quite happy at first , relishing  the technical plus points of the new broadcasts and trying to enjoy their contents. And then slowly the real nature of these broadcasts hit me  and I felt  a terribly let down.

Normally you build a  wall using  bricks with cement in between them. What happens if the process is reversed into one where   the wall is built with cement , with a few bricks thrown in? That is exactly what now all these neo-FM channels are indulging in…and I don’t mean ads… Read on…

Between playing  numbers, the radio jokers…ooops!…I meant the radio jockeys- let their hair down . With the  unisex appearance preferred these days that is possible, irrespective of the gender of the Jokeys . They  shoot off a continuous barrage of  of frivolities of the worst kind which leave the serious music  listener cold…a terrible, debilitating , numbing minus 40 degrees  !

For the first time I realised the huge potential  of the pair of ear phones supplied with my mobile for hands-free use ( the non-glued variety) . You can pull the damn things off when the going gets excruciatingly unbearable. A god-sent, they allow your ears to have a   much needed rest when  these  so-called ‘young things’ get going  full steam!

As if that is not enough torture, durng some intervals between songs   they test the ‘pea brains’ of their special variety of  listeners ( there will some in any lot )  by switching over to the  “Option round”( Courtesy: Idea Star Singer contest ?)

Here is an imaginary  sample..( the real ones are close to it!).

“Here is the next SMS question for you , folks !
What is the full name of Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi?
Option 1: Pandit Jawharlal Nehru
Option 2:  Sardar Vallabhai Patel
Opton 3: Lalu Prasad Yadav…
SMS your answer to “idiot0000’… blah blah blah…
The worst looser  will get a second hand carry bag of 25 micron thickness.. and stubs of two used tickets for the mega-movie IDIOT ”

Mind you,  there are takers for that!

Then there is this ‘cake-taking’ ‘dedication round’ during some intervals. It normally goes  something like this:

“This song is dedicated by ‘Ms. Blouse ’n Bra’ to her close   friends,  Ms. Pantless Eena , Ms. Braless Meena and Mr.Briefless Deekka …

I have heard of people dedicating something of their own creation to someone they care about, say a book, but dedicating a song  which is not of your making to somebody?
Or has someone changed the meaning of that word?

The most callous thing, the unkindest cut of all, that they do is to wake up some unsuspecting bloke ( who is  at his ‘ vulnerable best’ when woken up in the early morn like that ) and spoil his  beauty sleep !

When the phone is answered, they coo…

“Good Morning , Briefless, here is wishing you a happy birthday from Braless Meena! By the way, you are   Briefless,  aren’t you? Oh! You have your briefs on? Sorry! Please go back to sleep!’



And the last straw on the camel’s back is  the repeated didactic comments  by these DJ’s when the song ends.

These ‘still-wet-behind-the-ears’   hand down coolly unsolicited  advice about LIFE ( not of the variety dished out by Discovery Channel recently ), and its related complexities  as though they are the last word on the subject! They then proceed to  add insult to injury by telling  the listeners ( that is,  those who have not pulled the ear-phones off) how to face them !
It is  like the ‘emerging’  baby giving expert advice to its mother  in labour as to how to ‘push hard ’ during  labour !

Long Live The Kerala’s FM Stations…

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